
Overview
The loss of a baby can be hard. You may wonder why it happened. A loss can happen even in a pregnancy that had been going well.
In the weeks to come, try to take care of your physical and emotional needs. Take care of yourself in whatever way feels best.
Follow-up care is a key part of your treatment and safety. Be sure to make and go to all appointments, and call your doctor if you are having problems. It's also a good idea to know your test results and keep a list of the medicines you take.
How can you care for yourself at home?
Taking care of your body
- Use pads instead of tampons for vaginal bleeding. Bleeding may last about 4 to 6 weeks.
- Ask your doctor if you can take an over-the-counter pain medicine, such as acetaminophen (Tylenol), ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin), or naproxen (Aleve), to ease cramps. Be safe with medicines. Read and follow all instructions on the label.
- Ease soreness of hemorrhoids and the area between your vagina and rectum with ice compresses or witch hazel pads.
- Ease constipation by drinking lots of fluid and eating high-fiber foods. Ask your doctor about over-the-counter stool softeners.
- Cleanse yourself with a gentle squeeze of warm water from a bottle instead of wiping with toilet paper.
- Take a sitz bath in warm water several times a day.
- Talk to your doctor about how to ease discomfort from your milk coming in. It can take days to a few weeks for your milk to dry up.
- Ask your doctor about when it is okay for you to have vaginal sex.
- Talk to your doctor if you want to try to get pregnant soon. Your doctor can tell you when it is safe.
- If you don't want to get pregnant, talk to your doctor about birth control. You can get pregnant even before your period returns.
Taking care of your emotional health
- Rest whenever you can. Being tired can make it harder to cope with your emotions.
- Tell your family and friends what they can do. You may want to spend time alone, or you may seek support from family, friends, or religious or spiritual groups.
- Try to eat healthy foods, get some sleep, and get exercise (or just get outside) while you heal.
- Talk to your doctor about how you are coping. Your doctor will want to watch you for signs of depression. You may want to have counseling for support and to help you express your feelings.
- Think about making a memory book of your pregnancy and baby. You may choose to take pictures and keep a lock of hair. The hospital may take photos or footprints for you.
- If you can, try to talk to others who have gone through this loss. You can make connections online or in person. Here are some organizations that can help:
- The Compassionate Friends: Go to www.compassionatefriends.org for this resource for people who have lost a child. The group can help put you in touch with one of its support groups in your area.
- Share (Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support, Inc.): This group at www.nationalshare.org can offer advice and connections to others who have lost a child.
- The International Stillbirth Alliance: This group at www.stillbirthalliance.org offers information and resources.
When should you call for help?
Share this information with your partner, family, or a friend. They can help you watch for warning signs.
Call 911 anytime you think you may need emergency care. For example, call if:
- You have thoughts of harming yourself or another person.
- You passed out (lost consciousness).
- You have chest pain, are short of breath, or cough up blood.
- You have a seizure.
Where to get help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
If you or someone you know talks about suicide, self-harm, a mental health crisis, a substance use crisis, or any other kind of emotional distress, get help right away. You can:
- Call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
- Call 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
- Text HOME to 741741 to access the Crisis Text Line.
Consider saving these numbers in your phone.
Go to 988lifeline.org for more information or to chat online.
Call your doctor now or seek immediate medical care if:
- You have signs of hemorrhage (too much bleeding), such as:
- Heavy vaginal bleeding. This means that you are soaking through one or more pads in an hour. Or you pass blood clots bigger than an egg.
- Feeling dizzy or lightheaded, or you feel like you may faint.
- Feeling so tired or weak that you cannot do your usual activities.
- A fast or irregular heartbeat.
- New or worse belly pain.
- You have signs of infection, such as:
- A fever.
- Frequent or painful urination or blood in your urine.
- Vaginal discharge that smells bad.
- New or worse belly pain.
- You have symptoms of a blood clot in your leg (called a deep vein thrombosis), such as:
- Pain in the calf, back of the knee, thigh, or groin.
- Swelling in the leg or groin.
- A color change on the leg or groin. The skin may be reddish or purplish, depending on your usual skin color.
- You have signs of preeclampsia, such as:
- Sudden swelling of your face, hands, or feet.
- New vision problems (such as dimness, blurring, or seeing spots).
- A severe headache.
- You have signs of heart failure, such as:
- New or increased shortness of breath.
- New or worse swelling in your legs, ankles, or feet.
- Sudden weight gain, such as more than 2 to 3 pounds in a day or 5 pounds in a week.
- Feeling so tired or weak that you cannot do your usual activities.
- You had spinal or epidural pain relief and have:
- New or worse back pain.
- Increased pain, swelling, warmth, or redness at the injection site.
- Tingling, weakness, or numbness in your legs or groin.
Watch closely for changes in your health, and be sure to contact your doctor if:
- Your vaginal bleeding isn't decreasing.
- You feel sad, anxious, or hopeless for more than a few days.
- You are having problems with your breasts.
Where can you learn more?
Go to https://www.healthwise.net/patientEd
Enter G572 in the search box to learn more about "Stillbirth and Infant Loss (Vaginal Delivery): Care Instructions".
Current as of: July 11, 2023
Author: Healthwise Staff
Clinical Review Board: All Healthwise education is reviewed by a team that includes physicians, nurses, advanced practitioners, registered dieticians, and other healthcare professionals.